part of a crowd?

I watched New Moon.

and i don't know what's going on.

I was watching it illegally and i admit.

its downloaded so...urm...the quality is so so la~

BUT i really hate BELLA like how i hated....a porn star??

Bella's acting....is so not my type.

I feel like she is being raped or something on the scenes where she shouted in her nightmares.

I must say that I wasn't that looking forward to the film.

I mean, back at twilight, i was like almost blank about how successful the movie was until i came out the second time from the theater after the same movie. i even go round promoting the movies..

but this time..the only feeling i have is that,

"oh hey, its new moon...gosh! taytay is simply hot!!!"

Fine, i guess i need to watch it again....maybe i will get a better a picture of it EVENTUALLY...

and oh yea, my cameron highland trip....

if i were to summarize, i might say it this way:

"Keep braking bus, lotsa aunties and uncles, food, cold"

okay..

the BUS part....I sat at the last row of the bus.

and, fyi, even those sitting in front felt dizzy with the love-to-brake driver.

so we behind, i don't know, i was sleeping and simmers in 9blades stories...

i do feel the brakes thought, and the seat was really a "?" for me...

The seats are big enough but the whole structure is so not....well-designed..

Its is of course adjustable but throughout the whole 2 freakin days, i couldn't get a posture which i can sit on quietly enjoying my book for more than 5 minutes.

URGH!! when you are forced to sit UNCOMFORTABLY....i dont know bout u, but i feel like shit, it sort of affects a minor percent of my trip!

so then, the lotsa aunties part,

i actually disguised myself into a GOOD GIRL...

u knw, those who always smile and a mother-girl...

one of my intention joining the trip is to know my mum's working people and try to imagine her on work.

and since i was small, i wasn't borne with communication skills especially with adults...

The best thing i was doing is to smile...=）

pretending to be somewhat i am not,

yea, i can do this.

I always do this.

so, i got credits from some aunties, they commented that my brother is shy and i am more........friendly? ( i still think they wanted to say talkative....)

i was shocked, because the only thing i've ever done is SMILE at them and ...maybe nod my head a bit...wow! aunty, what a wide range of ur "friendly" huh....

and i did got something negative...

My mum's colleagues are SURPRISE with her daughter, ME, to be so capable in eating...

hey, its buffet, you don't expect healthy in buffet! We only want to eat and throw up and eat another round....

so i guess thats all of my trip this time.

and yea, i love slacking on the balcony of the apartment...

even the view is as normal as possible!

i was sitting there, listening to my songs, and thinking, imagining.....

I was thinking what would i be in a few years time

I was thinking how cruel the time have been for never slowing down

I was thinking my lovely friends

I was thinking bout the still-a-? trip

I was thinking of writing a story as for my personal christmas present..

I feel like having a real MERRY CHRISTMAS...

I want something warm and....memorable...till tears fill my journals..

Santa, you copy?

sometimes, its feels really good even by imagining the perfect christmas.

I see Christmas tree, I see presents, I see a lot of people i heart and i see a lot of food, laughters, joy.....

i m a chinese, i don't celebrate christmas...

How i wish i was a turkey, for i will be a MUST in every family's christmas~

sometimes we just wanted a tree with lotsa jingle bells and bulbs in a corner of the house...

It seem so easy but we never actually do it....why?

because we are too busy to live on that we don't spare time for this purpose.

we celebrate CNY, because we were given extra holidays but for christmas, we only got 1 day.

we might just spend it on shopping or a home-stay ...

see, how pathetic eh?

We don't even care about the events which we used to be looking forward of...

so one day in the future, i will forget the passions to blog, to jot down every single moment of my life...and sooner or later, i am no longer quietly fantastic...i will be part of a crowd...

so that's it? part of a crowd?

people wants to be unique when they're young,

but as time goes by, we just let ourself being domesticate by the world...

be as obedient as a cat to the world...

be one of the crowd...not outstanding, not care to be outstanding...

then we tell others that, ooh, its stupid to dream being outstanding...

is that so?

denying your once-dream? is that what growing up means?

_____________________________________

here's a song to share,

a song that tells my feeling right now at the moment,

Anything I'm Not - Lenka

I will never be, I will never be tall, no
And I will never be, never ever be sure of it all
Oh, why is the world so cruel to me
When all, all I ever want to be is anything I'm not

Gimme a break, a little escape
I am so tired of being me
I wanna be free, I wanna be new and different
Anything I'm not
I'm not

I will never be, I will never be you, no
I will always be, I will always be me, that I know
But oh, even though I'm happy being me
I want to get away from all this harsh reality, oh

Gimme a break, a little escape
I am so tired of being me
I wanna be free, I wanna be new and different
Anything I'm not

Yeah, gimme a break, a little escape
I am so tired of being me
I wanna be free, I wanna be new and different
Anything I'm not
Anything I'm not
Oh, anything I'm not

Gimme a break, a little escape
I am so tired of being me
I wanna be free, I wanna be new and different
Anything I'm not

Yeah, gimme a break, a little escape
I am so tired of being me
I wanna be free, I wanna be new and different
Anything I'm not
Anything I'm not
Anything I'm not
Anything I'm not
Anything I'm not