Its merdeka day and racist issue pop up..
how sarcastic i just heard some big people which i forgot who on tv
who say malaysian is now understanding the concept of one malaysia better
whatever. I used to be not that like Malaysia.
okay, I used to hate Malaysia.
USED TO. ok!
until I learn that the best food in my life all lies in this country
i changed my thoughts.. NAHHHHHHH
not all of it la.
it was when i found this quote:
"People marry other races because they thought their own is too terrible. but the truth is, they just thought marrying other races makes them somehow different from her own she-thought-to-be terrible race. and for these people, kindly tell them, your race is in your blood your DNA. Start respecting this fact."
something like this, i added up a bit.
Malaysia is kinda cute in a way,
My favourite is my everyday life
where i see people talking multiple language in a few sentences
where uncles go kopitiam and waste their life away
where aunties gossip in pasar
where.......I grew up.
Malaysia is cute in a way, Penang is the cutest.
i love the beaches and sun and the memories i have with all my friends here.
I just wanna say, although i am not patriotic enough to claim i love malaysia damn much,
but this is where i grow, where i learn, where i fall, where i become who i am.
I will die without durian, charkeowteow, nasi lemak, laksa, ais kacang, cendol, kuih, kueykak, pao, gardenia...............
maybe its just me, i heart this country because it had all i needed to sustain--AWESOME MEMORABLE FOOD.
The story goes this way:
Tuesday 31 August 2010
Thursday 26 August 2010
I've got a news from my friend.
simple stories. break up.
well, I'm not really concerned about that break up story
oh come on, if there's only 2 person that bothers in a relationship, any more that we only need 2 person to commit a break up.
I'm sick of those times where people run about worrying bout couples.
damn, they are old enough to love, then they are old enough to not love.
and i think, they way dumbos go round worrying is just a way to show their love to those they care, but the truth is, they just interested in one of the couple and intend to test their ability.
call me sarcastic, call me jealousy, call me unwanted-by-everyone,
Me need not your definition, I'm doing good with mine.
okay.not that part.
what i'm gonna talk about
is the fact that I'm being informed.
i'm friend to somebody. that's good.
=)
then again, back to my exam.
urm, hardly see my schoolmates on facebook
which indicates that they ARE studying hard?
I don't know. well, since that's not gonna be me doing like them
might as well just ignore it and do it my way
my friends should know that I've been into a drama named time story
a taiwan drama.
they have a 2nd version. but a totally different story and actors.
the same old thing is the background of earlier Taiwan.
"Shining Days".
I once intended to watch it. but dunno why just lose my interest and determination.
and i found my latest favourite type of drama.
those stories about earlier times.
I'm watching "Together", "shining days", "Gods of Honour".
old enough.
闪亮的日子--罗大佑
我来唱一首歌 古老的那首歌
我轻轻的唱 你慢慢的和
是否你还记得过去的梦想
那充满希望灿烂的岁月
你我为了理想 历经了艰苦
我们曾经哭泣 也曾共同欢笑
但愿你会记得 永远的记着
我们曾经拥有 闪亮的日子
你我为了理想 历经了艰苦
我们曾经拥有 闪亮的日子
its the same old story like every other drama,
you know, a bunch of kids and as they grow...things happen.
but i like it.
oh guess what.
one of my schoolmates replied my facebook status.
I'm not alone.
Michael Jackson is right, I am not alone!
Thanks goodnessss
simple stories. break up.
well, I'm not really concerned about that break up story
oh come on, if there's only 2 person that bothers in a relationship, any more that we only need 2 person to commit a break up.
I'm sick of those times where people run about worrying bout couples.
damn, they are old enough to love, then they are old enough to not love.
and i think, they way dumbos go round worrying is just a way to show their love to those they care, but the truth is, they just interested in one of the couple and intend to test their ability.
call me sarcastic, call me jealousy, call me unwanted-by-everyone,
Me need not your definition, I'm doing good with mine.
okay.not that part.
what i'm gonna talk about
is the fact that I'm being informed.
i'm friend to somebody. that's good.
=)
then again, back to my exam.
urm, hardly see my schoolmates on facebook
which indicates that they ARE studying hard?
I don't know. well, since that's not gonna be me doing like them
might as well just ignore it and do it my way
my friends should know that I've been into a drama named time story
a taiwan drama.
they have a 2nd version. but a totally different story and actors.
the same old thing is the background of earlier Taiwan.
"Shining Days".
I once intended to watch it. but dunno why just lose my interest and determination.
and i found my latest favourite type of drama.
those stories about earlier times.
I'm watching "Together", "shining days", "Gods of Honour".
old enough.
闪亮的日子--罗大佑
我来唱一首歌 古老的那首歌
我轻轻的唱 你慢慢的和
是否你还记得过去的梦想
那充满希望灿烂的岁月
你我为了理想 历经了艰苦
我们曾经哭泣 也曾共同欢笑
但愿你会记得 永远的记着
我们曾经拥有 闪亮的日子
你我为了理想 历经了艰苦
我们曾经拥有 闪亮的日子
its the same old story like every other drama,
you know, a bunch of kids and as they grow...things happen.
but i like it.
oh guess what.
one of my schoolmates replied my facebook status.
I'm not alone.
Michael Jackson is right, I am not alone!
Thanks goodnessss
Wednesday 25 August 2010
sleep till i'm hungry and eat till i a sleepy.I love, that's why i exist.
**i think i really love photography.
and my latest addiction? Portraits.
Its exam period and i closed my blog.
i just wanna shut down i guess.
i m gonna open it real soon
it feels good to disappear once in a while
even pure virtually
I still haven done that email i planned for my lecturer
anyhow just let it be
i wasnt blogging these few days
cause i'm guilty for spending my time feeling"home-ish"
awh....those time when I need not worry bout what's for dinner what's for lunch
ah ma is here, she will have everything taken care
all i need to do is sit back and watch tv, waiting to be called for dinner
life's good this way. especially when I'm dead broke.
but this is exam man. STUDY WEEK they have it named
yes,i'm supposed to study
but the thing is i found some new tv show that is very attracting
Never tell me the silly theory of "study first, enjoy then"
I'm not that kind of person. I'm sure.
My full time job is a rocker and my part time is a student.
i am who i am. I know that
that's why I never try to show out the accounting knowledge of mine
and my one major wish now is to become a sales promoter for lomo camera
I can repeat stories of lomo camera forever and ever
but not a single word of Financial Reporting standard
in my this quietly fantastic life, Life comes first, Food second. No third. study is part of life.
PART OF
get it. don't expect much on me in studies
I hate it.
(somehow, i thought i lose my ability to blog, but now, WAY NO!)
and i know I've neglected framing all it up for quite sometime
i wouldn't use that word "neglect" if i had a better word.
but i just don't.
I think neglect is better than forget, AT LEAST? or maybe lazy..?
Flickr is giving me problem. photos are un-upload-able
i dunno why. but what ever
i don't care eh eh eh
There's gotta be a hundred solutions to one problem, just crack your head, and you will get more.
***************************************
like I have said months ago
I'm implementing positive thinking.
=)
see me smiling? yea, i'm still very positive
even my laptop went down in quite a wrong moment
i acted like i'm positive
I just wanna say,it really works.
for me, at least.
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
***************************************
there was one day i woke up QUITE early to go market, with my grandma
and I thought of this one thing,
My grandma just know which spot in that huge and un-arranged market has the best food
she just know everyone's taste at home
she know how to plan every meal
she remember to cook our favourite dishes
she can handle all cookings by herself 365 days a year
its like she know all those details in life that you don't even bother
but she cares
like every lil cough i have in the morning
the amount of water i drank everyday
the amount of food intake I've had
In every family, there are kids who dream big and do what a teenager do
and beside all these naive kids who thought they can rule the world
are their elders who scolded them, caned them and eventually,
thought them when where and how to soft themselves down.
As we grow, from a naive kids that has all kind of temper and dreams,
we slowly learned the word "forfeit". its nothing to be ashamed of.
everyone has been through this stage. Just that have you let go of it, or you're still stuck there in between?
*blog closed.what's the point of showing picture?
I dunno. just for fun.
I love, that's why i exist.
and my latest addiction? Portraits.
Its exam period and i closed my blog.
i just wanna shut down i guess.
i m gonna open it real soon
it feels good to disappear once in a while
even pure virtually
I still haven done that email i planned for my lecturer
anyhow just let it be
i wasnt blogging these few days
cause i'm guilty for spending my time feeling"home-ish"
awh....those time when I need not worry bout what's for dinner what's for lunch
ah ma is here, she will have everything taken care
all i need to do is sit back and watch tv, waiting to be called for dinner
life's good this way. especially when I'm dead broke.
but this is exam man. STUDY WEEK they have it named
yes,i'm supposed to study
but the thing is i found some new tv show that is very attracting
Never tell me the silly theory of "study first, enjoy then"
I'm not that kind of person. I'm sure.
My full time job is a rocker and my part time is a student.
i am who i am. I know that
that's why I never try to show out the accounting knowledge of mine
and my one major wish now is to become a sales promoter for lomo camera
I can repeat stories of lomo camera forever and ever
but not a single word of Financial Reporting standard
in my this quietly fantastic life, Life comes first, Food second. No third. study is part of life.
PART OF
get it. don't expect much on me in studies
I hate it.
(somehow, i thought i lose my ability to blog, but now, WAY NO!)
and i know I've neglected framing all it up for quite sometime
i wouldn't use that word "neglect" if i had a better word.
but i just don't.
I think neglect is better than forget, AT LEAST? or maybe lazy..?
Flickr is giving me problem. photos are un-upload-able
i dunno why. but what ever
i don't care eh eh eh
There's gotta be a hundred solutions to one problem, just crack your head, and you will get more.
***************************************
like I have said months ago
I'm implementing positive thinking.
=)
see me smiling? yea, i'm still very positive
even my laptop went down in quite a wrong moment
i acted like i'm positive
I just wanna say,it really works.
for me, at least.
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
***************************************
there was one day i woke up QUITE early to go market, with my grandma
and I thought of this one thing,
My grandma just know which spot in that huge and un-arranged market has the best food
she just know everyone's taste at home
she know how to plan every meal
she remember to cook our favourite dishes
she can handle all cookings by herself 365 days a year
its like she know all those details in life that you don't even bother
but she cares
like every lil cough i have in the morning
the amount of water i drank everyday
the amount of food intake I've had
In every family, there are kids who dream big and do what a teenager do
and beside all these naive kids who thought they can rule the world
are their elders who scolded them, caned them and eventually,
thought them when where and how to soft themselves down.
As we grow, from a naive kids that has all kind of temper and dreams,
we slowly learned the word "forfeit". its nothing to be ashamed of.
everyone has been through this stage. Just that have you let go of it, or you're still stuck there in between?
*blog closed.what's the point of showing picture?
I dunno. just for fun.
I love, that's why i exist.
Thursday 19 August 2010
Can somebody please stand in front of me and tell everyone else aloud that,
I am under pressure........?
I can't tell that on my own,
it makes me feel like a complete loser.
or maybe its not pressure, I'm just having too much to process.
studies, stories, life.
but now i know where is my priority,
my study
i will crack my head.
but deep down, i know that there will be this one day,
where I let everything go, and went on a one way trip with no turning back.
I wanna run away. I wanna escape.
I wanna withdraw, from life.
I am under pressure........?
I can't tell that on my own,
it makes me feel like a complete loser.
or maybe its not pressure, I'm just having too much to process.
studies, stories, life.
but now i know where is my priority,
my study
i will crack my head.
but deep down, i know that there will be this one day,
where I let everything go, and went on a one way trip with no turning back.
I wanna run away. I wanna escape.
I wanna withdraw, from life.
I got mad.
exam is right there at the corner
I feel like I'm under a lot of pressure.
a lot of unspoken feeling drowning me.
I'm suffocating.
Life's hard I guess.
As much as I've studied, i hate it all.
I admit I don't really like studying,hardworking bla bla bla
I think my problem is not about accounting
its just that, I just don't fit for studying.
Its hard for me to concentrate in classes.
and I feel emo everytime tests or exams approach
damn damn damn
I see people enjoy their life a lot
u know, partying, partying partying
partying is not my thing, for i hate dancing and...crowd?
I dunno.
but i wonder where their time come from.
when I'm at home feeling miserable
they are partying
when I'm at school feeling tired
they are partying
when I'm at exam hall feeling dead
they are STILL partying
maybe thats why i say life's hard.
its hard to CONVINCE yourself that by forfeiting those fun time you can have right now
will promise you a bright future.
but what to do.
life never do come with choices.
exam is right there at the corner
I feel like I'm under a lot of pressure.
a lot of unspoken feeling drowning me.
I'm suffocating.
Life's hard I guess.
As much as I've studied, i hate it all.
I admit I don't really like studying,hardworking bla bla bla
I think my problem is not about accounting
its just that, I just don't fit for studying.
Its hard for me to concentrate in classes.
and I feel emo everytime tests or exams approach
damn damn damn
I see people enjoy their life a lot
u know, partying, partying partying
partying is not my thing, for i hate dancing and...crowd?
I dunno.
but i wonder where their time come from.
when I'm at home feeling miserable
they are partying
when I'm at school feeling tired
they are partying
when I'm at exam hall feeling dead
they are STILL partying
maybe thats why i say life's hard.
its hard to CONVINCE yourself that by forfeiting those fun time you can have right now
will promise you a bright future.
but what to do.
life never do come with choices.
感谢上天，让我很平庸， 感谢生命，让我很简单。
很多时候，打打杀杀的情节比什么恋爱夕阳都还要催泪
因为刀子如果硬生生捅进去
飞流直下三千尺的是红彤彤的血
纠结的情感也会顿时松开
好像忘了究竟是为了什么才走到今天这一步
我做完发了个梦
我梦到我和一群朋友
绑架了好像是美国总统
然后就这样那样
过后就剩下我一个人在逃难
他妈的，我知道这个应该是之前看IRIS留下的后遗症
但当我被抓进监牢（在梦中）
我很怕很怕也很后悔很后悔
为什么会这样
我哭了
结果睁开眼睛
看着风扇转阿转
我觉得自己白痴得可以
但那个梦真得很真
因为被单是湿的
昨晚不管三七二十一的
一定要赶回家
连在宿舍多睡一晚都觉得多余的悲哀
妈妈交待我驾车小心一点，毕竟不早了
有时候真的矛盾得可以
不喜欢总是被家里的绳子拴住
但却因为有那一条绳子
所以觉得既是世界变得又多糟
只要回家，一切都会好
就算快考试了
回到家
棉被会给我温暖
所有的唠叨
会让我心安
即使真得很吵。
感谢上天，让我很平庸
感谢生命，让我很简单
Wednesday 18 August 2010
I like myself being sarcastic somehow...
People tend to say that I speak with no mercy...
which i never ever intended to
somehow maybe yes, but I just didn't realized?
i was actually planning on mailing one of my lecturer
which i couldnt bear to see her being so....RAW in education line...
she was so new and took things double seriously
thats why i think she deserve a serious comment from her students (ME)
ha! people like me never really take that evaluation form from college seriously
those were just papers with random words that people give no bullshit about it
but my this too-new lecturer does... sighhss...
maybe i should tell her this one truth,
"Definition of a College professor: someone who talks in other people’s sleep"
i once thought of seeing her and tell her all in person, like face to face,
holy craps, thanks god i didn't
everyone was like "kahinn, you better email her, if you tell her face to face...i think she might end up crying...
Deep down, i'm a very shallow person.
I don't suppose I'll give her like you know, PRECIOUS opinions
but I am true.
and sometimes, i think i do have a mind of a normal students:
"Play First! Sleep Second! Eat Third! Think Never!"
oh...students.
or should i say normal people....who the shit cares.
People tend to say that I speak with no mercy...
which i never ever intended to
somehow maybe yes, but I just didn't realized?
i was actually planning on mailing one of my lecturer
which i couldnt bear to see her being so....RAW in education line...
she was so new and took things double seriously
thats why i think she deserve a serious comment from her students (ME)
ha! people like me never really take that evaluation form from college seriously
those were just papers with random words that people give no bullshit about it
but my this too-new lecturer does... sighhss...
maybe i should tell her this one truth,
"Definition of a College professor: someone who talks in other people’s sleep"
i once thought of seeing her and tell her all in person, like face to face,
holy craps, thanks god i didn't
everyone was like "kahinn, you better email her, if you tell her face to face...i think she might end up crying...
Deep down, i'm a very shallow person.
I don't suppose I'll give her like you know, PRECIOUS opinions
but I am true.
and sometimes, i think i do have a mind of a normal students:
"Play First! Sleep Second! Eat Third! Think Never!"
oh...students.
or should i say normal people....who the shit cares.
Saturday 14 August 2010
I sumpah will live on well!
-cousins =)
who accompanied me to meet chingu
-CHINGU LINNNNN!!!
--cousins =)
-- still! ha!
=)
=DDDD
SO, I saw my chingu FINALLY!
we hugged!
she cried!
I excited!
We walked!
We see!
we eat!
We buy!
We Joke!
We.....be us again!!
I of course have a lot to say
I feel very good.
This is the greatest day so far!
ever since everyone started leaving my life slowly
Life get a bit complicated
tests assignments friends farewells
today was good. indeed.
the feeling is major
when i see her and ran up to her
Its good to see we both still staying vain.
-VAINER!-
i think i need time to sort out my feelings today
everything and everything
maybe all my bad lucks in life
are for the exchange of good lucks like today
If chingu didn't went johor
i would never had the chance to do what I am doing
I guess.
No one of my life ever shared anything of mine from this land(johor)
people wondered what's so big deal with this land
this was like my secret garden where i only visit once in a while
but it get so much awesome each time
and now
another reason came in
=)
I have friends hereeee!!
other thn pure relatives!
I can share !!!!
oh! finally, God get me some companion in this secret lil garden!
=)
the whole thing was preset!
whatever I'm having are all destined!
thank god.
for giving me a life.
with awesome friends and cousins!
I sumpah will live on well!
alright. I'm in town finally.
very near to Chingu Lin.
=)
I had my worst flight ever this afternoon.
AirAsia, from penang to senai.
damn.
my first flight after the minor renovation of Penang Airport
the waiting hall is freakin freakin FREAKIN smalll!!
AND, we have to wait there until we're CALLED and then only we're allowed thru one door that lead us to our boarding gate...
FINE, then, when I was on the flight
and the plane was about to depart
thn the last passenger came and so happen that she is seated beside me.
she's hugging a big bear and listening some songs from her handphone.
alright, things were completely alright until the plane start moving and prepare to depart.
I glance over that girl beside me,
OH MY GOODNESS! SHE IS SMS-ING!! SHE JUST RECEIVED A NEW MESSAGE....!!!
the plane is stil departing, and she is constantly sending and receiving message...
i wonder is this her first time to be on flight?
OI! SENDING SMS LEH!! ANYTHING GOES WRONG THEN I MIGHT DIE YOU KNOWWWW!!
I dun wanna die YET! i still wanna live until i'm old enough to queue at the senior citizen lane....
and i kept looking she kept sending..
and i was so coward that, i didn't or should i say DARE NOT speak a word..
damn, leekahinn is a 200% cowardd.....
but okay la...since i'm safe till now that i can blog...
then the 2nd thing in the flight,
we went thru some bad weather
yala, its very normal to have met bad weather
BUT this time, i'm feeling very uncomfortable.
I was going to vomit and, the flight started shaking
and some people gets so excited and started laughing
and some people gets so scared and started screaming
I got no time to think which group of people should i belong to
i was busy feeling PENING KEPALA because of all those noise..
i almost stood up and shouted SHUT UP.
yalo, ALMOST..............almost is almost lo
worst ever flight.
i dun wanna remember it..
ANYHOW, i'm seeing chingu tml!!
lalallalaal~
SARANGHAE CHINGU YO!!!!!!
very near to Chingu Lin.
=)
I had my worst flight ever this afternoon.
AirAsia, from penang to senai.
damn.
my first flight after the minor renovation of Penang Airport
the waiting hall is freakin freakin FREAKIN smalll!!
AND, we have to wait there until we're CALLED and then only we're allowed thru one door that lead us to our boarding gate...
FINE, then, when I was on the flight
and the plane was about to depart
thn the last passenger came and so happen that she is seated beside me.
she's hugging a big bear and listening some songs from her handphone.
alright, things were completely alright until the plane start moving and prepare to depart.
I glance over that girl beside me,
OH MY GOODNESS! SHE IS SMS-ING!! SHE JUST RECEIVED A NEW MESSAGE....!!!
the plane is stil departing, and she is constantly sending and receiving message...
i wonder is this her first time to be on flight?
OI! SENDING SMS LEH!! ANYTHING GOES WRONG THEN I MIGHT DIE YOU KNOWWWW!!
I dun wanna die YET! i still wanna live until i'm old enough to queue at the senior citizen lane....
and i kept looking she kept sending..
and i was so coward that, i didn't or should i say DARE NOT speak a word..
damn, leekahinn is a 200% cowardd.....
but okay la...since i'm safe till now that i can blog...
then the 2nd thing in the flight,
we went thru some bad weather
yala, its very normal to have met bad weather
BUT this time, i'm feeling very uncomfortable.
I was going to vomit and, the flight started shaking
and some people gets so excited and started laughing
and some people gets so scared and started screaming
I got no time to think which group of people should i belong to
i was busy feeling PENING KEPALA because of all those noise..
i almost stood up and shouted SHUT UP.
yalo, ALMOST..............almost is almost lo
worst ever flight.
i dun wanna remember it..
ANYHOW, i'm seeing chingu tml!!
lalallalaal~
SARANGHAE CHINGU YO!!!!!!
Monday 9 August 2010
Next Plane Home
3.37pm in the afternoon.
I sat in my favourite library.
Internet is still unavailable in hostel.
damn it. I hate it when people work only when I demand them to
I hate calling up and complain
so everytime I do so,
I make sure it is sound AND, NO NEXT TIME
and TM, be ready. you're next on list.
This is a rather free week on my schedule.
minus the fact that its actually perfect for me to start my revision.
but i'd rather spend it on daydreaming and EXPECTING for this weekend.
oh, my dearest chingu, finally after every i-miss-u-u-miss-me-too..
LOL
14 14 14 14! FREAKING 14!!! =)
I spent a glass of watermelon's time with a friend last night.
Listening to her story.
And my comment? well, that's life.
each one of us has our own story, its the matter of willingness to share.
sometimes we feel good when people tell us their story.
because they only tell when they think you're reliable.
its good to "be" reliable.
or sometimes, they just tell out becz they needed to tell out.
anyhow, listening to others stories is good,
in the sense that, you know another ugly truth in this world.
Learning ugly truth is the second best way to grow
the first best? to be the ugly truth yourself.
I hate it 100times when people try to tell me fairy tales.
damn, if fairy tales were true, tell me bout Princess Diana!
Fairy tales could be a start or an end. never the story itself.
lala..so there goes the story of fairy tales, from someone who is not even qualified for love.
.................
I have a lot to talk about ACTUALLY.
but I don't know, maybe I'm too tired or whatever.
I just wanna take back what was taken away from me.
and I refreshed my Must-cry-list of songs
now, I'm having "one last cry" by brian mcknight
I somehow think I'm a very emotional person.
bcz I cry when I listen to songs even its about some story which i never experienced before.
maybe, maybe I do have awesome imagination power...
one last cry....one last cry......
.................
I dreamed about a bad dream the other day.
been thinking of writing it out.
it was like a whole long story where I woke up having my blanket and pillows all wet.
damn, its a terrible sad dream..
...................
found this on tumblr:
so all in all, I wanna end this whole dunno what post with this photo,
which i came into on tumblr:
I sat in my favourite library.
Internet is still unavailable in hostel.
damn it. I hate it when people work only when I demand them to
I hate calling up and complain
so everytime I do so,
I make sure it is sound AND, NO NEXT TIME
and TM, be ready. you're next on list.
This is a rather free week on my schedule.
minus the fact that its actually perfect for me to start my revision.
but i'd rather spend it on daydreaming and EXPECTING for this weekend.
oh, my dearest chingu, finally after every i-miss-u-u-miss-me-too..
LOL
14 14 14 14! FREAKING 14!!! =)
I spent a glass of watermelon's time with a friend last night.
Listening to her story.
And my comment? well, that's life.
each one of us has our own story, its the matter of willingness to share.
sometimes we feel good when people tell us their story.
because they only tell when they think you're reliable.
its good to "be" reliable.
or sometimes, they just tell out becz they needed to tell out.
anyhow, listening to others stories is good,
in the sense that, you know another ugly truth in this world.
Learning ugly truth is the second best way to grow
the first best? to be the ugly truth yourself.
I hate it 100times when people try to tell me fairy tales.
damn, if fairy tales were true, tell me bout Princess Diana!
Fairy tales could be a start or an end. never the story itself.
lala..so there goes the story of fairy tales, from someone who is not even qualified for love.
.................
I have a lot to talk about ACTUALLY.
but I don't know, maybe I'm too tired or whatever.
I just wanna take back what was taken away from me.
and I refreshed my Must-cry-list of songs
now, I'm having "one last cry" by brian mcknight
I somehow think I'm a very emotional person.
bcz I cry when I listen to songs even its about some story which i never experienced before.
maybe, maybe I do have awesome imagination power...
one last cry....one last cry......
.................
I dreamed about a bad dream the other day.
been thinking of writing it out.
it was like a whole long story where I woke up having my blanket and pillows all wet.
damn, its a terrible sad dream..
...................
found this on tumblr:
life is the best school.
God is the best teacher.
Problem is the best assignment.
Failure is the best revision.
God is the best teacher.
Problem is the best assignment.
Failure is the best revision.
so all in all, I wanna end this whole dunno what post with this photo,
which i came into on tumblr:
( alright, it failed to be loaded, so suak. no fate. bye.)
and I just wanna emphasize again,
I MISS TIME STORY.
=)
and,*WINK*
14th is 5 more days to go...
=DDDDDDD
I MISS TIME STORY.
=)
and,*WINK*
14th is 5 more days to go...
=DDDDDDD
Friday 6 August 2010
I wanna go real far far away.
So far that reminds me of home. I always dream to backpack around, which I know everyone share this lil wonderful dream.
“Far away from home”—Groove Coverage.
Am listening very very closely. I ended a presentation a few days before. I was really proud, of myself. Its not like I’m the best or what, but I’ve done what I wanted. I have spongebob video in my presentation, and also, spongebob on my Qcards.
As we grow, things fall out of our prediction. We stop predicting and start hoping. And so we pray.
A kid pray because he was told to do so.
An adult pray because he don’t know what else to do.
Chances to do things OUR WAY get lesser and lesser. When it comes to this one point that I get to give it all out, I don’t wanna hold back anymore. I used to fear, but now, I only wanna stop regretting. Regretting sucks max.
Show Hand, if to be put in the term of gambling.
Final exam is approaching. And I suddenly found my favourite spot in college, the library.
The first ever time I realize bout it. I was there a few days ago, and seriously, I’m thinking of wearing ankle-length bottoms to school. I used to think its fussy (dress code for library) but now, hey! I think total different.
I think I never stop mentioning how much I wanted a backpack travel. But somehow, it is so, unreal. Because I cry every time I heard “Far away from home” by Groove Coverage. I can drive home like, in an hour, but I can’t in the sense that, PETROL is killing. I just miss home, even sometimes I don’t talk much at home, I just want that feeling of home. Like, yea, finally.
I sprained my ankle on Wednesday. A very slightly one. Nothing much, but still ache for a lil. But I can still walk and run and drive and…anything. I sms my mum asking is there anything I can do to speed up the healing process, my mum called up and asked. And yesterday, my dad called. I feel like a loser, for my dad sounded worry even I keep telling I’m more than fine. Just a lil, tiny lil sprain. This is how I feel my distant from home.
I came across some road trip photos and it all looked AWESOME. I see bunch of friends sleeping in the car. I see messy junk food scattered around the car. I see them in the middle of nowhere.
A road trip. Silently, being added into my wishlist.
I seldom cross out anything from my wishlist, but I’ve just did one recently. Not going to mention it here, what’s pass let it go. The best thing one can do when its raining is to let it rain, NON?
So far that reminds me of home. I always dream to backpack around, which I know everyone share this lil wonderful dream.
“Far away from home”—Groove Coverage.
Am listening very very closely. I ended a presentation a few days before. I was really proud, of myself. Its not like I’m the best or what, but I’ve done what I wanted. I have spongebob video in my presentation, and also, spongebob on my Qcards.
As we grow, things fall out of our prediction. We stop predicting and start hoping. And so we pray.
A kid pray because he was told to do so.
An adult pray because he don’t know what else to do.
Chances to do things OUR WAY get lesser and lesser. When it comes to this one point that I get to give it all out, I don’t wanna hold back anymore. I used to fear, but now, I only wanna stop regretting. Regretting sucks max.
Show Hand, if to be put in the term of gambling.
Final exam is approaching. And I suddenly found my favourite spot in college, the library.
The first ever time I realize bout it. I was there a few days ago, and seriously, I’m thinking of wearing ankle-length bottoms to school. I used to think its fussy (dress code for library) but now, hey! I think total different.
I think I never stop mentioning how much I wanted a backpack travel. But somehow, it is so, unreal. Because I cry every time I heard “Far away from home” by Groove Coverage. I can drive home like, in an hour, but I can’t in the sense that, PETROL is killing. I just miss home, even sometimes I don’t talk much at home, I just want that feeling of home. Like, yea, finally.
I sprained my ankle on Wednesday. A very slightly one. Nothing much, but still ache for a lil. But I can still walk and run and drive and…anything. I sms my mum asking is there anything I can do to speed up the healing process, my mum called up and asked. And yesterday, my dad called. I feel like a loser, for my dad sounded worry even I keep telling I’m more than fine. Just a lil, tiny lil sprain. This is how I feel my distant from home.
I came across some road trip photos and it all looked AWESOME. I see bunch of friends sleeping in the car. I see messy junk food scattered around the car. I see them in the middle of nowhere.
A road trip. Silently, being added into my wishlist.
I seldom cross out anything from my wishlist, but I’ve just did one recently. Not going to mention it here, what’s pass let it go. The best thing one can do when its raining is to let it rain, NON?
I'm so, far away from home.
Tuesday 3 August 2010
something in myself that I don't quite understand
its tomorrow.
the presentation.
I don't know, but to some extend, I'm a bit of lost.
and nervous.
these days.
the cloud kept on moving that the sunshine on me never stop changing.
In this crowded college, I'm glad I found at least few of them
was watching IRIS these days.
another u-spy-me-i-spy-you-back kind of drama
and I'm watching
This whole world was a freakin flimflam
its so fed up that, I couldn't help thinking so
i read a lot of novels and watched a lot of movies
all showing me one thing
this world somehow, is not quite like what it appears to be
People go round with different purpose
This whole thing was a hoax
as we climb up this huge hierarchy of life
we were told that there's a wonderful life ahead
so we work hard. and harder
sometimes life ended even before we stop working hard
as we go up and up
we see more and more.....
there's a bigger hole behind one another
each after each
we never stop learning, learning all new reasons to be evil.
they say its not evil, its just a kind of way.
and then I learned.
If you wanna live happily ever after, learn to be not so obsessive
In a game of fraud, you're not deceived until you reveal the last final card.
it sounds a bit self-consoling
but if that makes you feel better, WHO THE SHIT CARES
自己了解自己的悲哀
每个朋友都会教会你一些事。但最好的那个，会教你如何当一个最好的朋友。
常常说如果时光可以倒流
为什么说如果
因为不可能
为什么常常说
因为说出来可以换来温暖的回忆
如果不再回忆
就无需再小心翼翼的生活
把每分每秒
珍藏似的捧在手心里慢慢耗掉
以为这样就叫珍惜时光
可到头来却少了好多碰击的火花
也许蹉跎也是一种摇滚
看着手表滴滴答答
怀疑自己为什么要
对不停循环的数字负责
为什么要努力的追赶一直在画圆的时间
结果从来就只会更狼狈
可是大家也都这样
无视自己身上的伤
一味地跑着追着赶着
偶尔摔个一两下
后来却怎么也想不起自己为什么要这样
一个人开着车在城市里晃
走那些曾经一起走过的路
搜索所谓的喧嚣后的寂寞痕迹
但寂寞他无痕
我就这样过了一天
没有什么寂寞痕迹
只有无端耗掉的车油
一个地方之所以有意义
因为我们曾经一起，在那里
曾经一起在那里，可能遇见
可能拥抱
可能聊天
可能，道别。
而任何一方不在了
落单的也只能落寞
任由路灯把自己的影子越拉越长
慢慢习惯一个人的脚步声
和不再有人搭理的肩膀
也许别人突然从自己身边呼啸而过
一怔，原来这也是一种寂寞
别人喧哗的声音
自己咆哮的寂寞
我远远看着那些快乐人群
再转身离开
不抽烟的人
好像无法唯美的寂寞
只能自己制造氛围
自己high
自己了解自己的悲哀
网络很流行这句：
“我抽的不是烟，是寂寞”
我也寂寞，上瘾性的
也就是，自己惹来的
他们说文学家很擅长把自己的烦恼大众化
也许吧！
至少，如果没有琼瑶，我不会了解知道大自然和男欢女爱其实可以摆在一起比喻
如果没有藤井树，我不会知道男孩和女孩简短的谈话可能藏着千百种思绪
如果没有恩佐，我不会明白那些寂寞的背后，寂寞的成长过程
如果没有九把刀，我不会了解人生就是一场战斗，一场值得燃尽所有最后一丝力气的战斗
我庆幸我遇到过这些人。谢谢他们努力的站在有光的地方，
至少这样我知道这个世界还没有变得太糟。
最后，谢谢五月天，因为他们是五月天。
一个，影响我至情至深的乐团
如果当初亲古没有介绍我那一首垃圾车
今天的我不会是这样。
而我，喜欢那个爱五月天的我。
这些人，就是我的答案。
人生的问题难题应用题思考题，这些，就是我的答案。
常常说如果时光可以倒流
为什么说如果
因为不可能
为什么常常说
因为说出来可以换来温暖的回忆
如果不再回忆
就无需再小心翼翼的生活
把每分每秒
珍藏似的捧在手心里慢慢耗掉
以为这样就叫珍惜时光
可到头来却少了好多碰击的火花
也许蹉跎也是一种摇滚
看着手表滴滴答答
怀疑自己为什么要
对不停循环的数字负责
为什么要努力的追赶一直在画圆的时间
结果从来就只会更狼狈
可是大家也都这样
无视自己身上的伤
一味地跑着追着赶着
偶尔摔个一两下
后来却怎么也想不起自己为什么要这样
一个人开着车在城市里晃
走那些曾经一起走过的路
搜索所谓的喧嚣后的寂寞痕迹
但寂寞他无痕
我就这样过了一天
没有什么寂寞痕迹
只有无端耗掉的车油
一个地方之所以有意义
因为我们曾经一起，在那里
曾经一起在那里，可能遇见
可能拥抱
可能聊天
可能，道别。
而任何一方不在了
落单的也只能落寞
任由路灯把自己的影子越拉越长
慢慢习惯一个人的脚步声
和不再有人搭理的肩膀
也许别人突然从自己身边呼啸而过
一怔，原来这也是一种寂寞
别人喧哗的声音
自己咆哮的寂寞
我远远看着那些快乐人群
再转身离开
不抽烟的人
好像无法唯美的寂寞
只能自己制造氛围
自己high
自己了解自己的悲哀
网络很流行这句：
“我抽的不是烟，是寂寞”
我也寂寞，上瘾性的
也就是，自己惹来的
他们说文学家很擅长把自己的烦恼大众化
也许吧！
至少，如果没有琼瑶，我不会了解知道大自然和男欢女爱其实可以摆在一起比喻
如果没有藤井树，我不会知道男孩和女孩简短的谈话可能藏着千百种思绪
如果没有恩佐，我不会明白那些寂寞的背后，寂寞的成长过程
如果没有九把刀，我不会了解人生就是一场战斗，一场值得燃尽所有最后一丝力气的战斗
我庆幸我遇到过这些人。谢谢他们努力的站在有光的地方，
至少这样我知道这个世界还没有变得太糟。
最后，谢谢五月天，因为他们是五月天。
一个，影响我至情至深的乐团
如果当初亲古没有介绍我那一首垃圾车
今天的我不会是这样。
而我，喜欢那个爱五月天的我。
这些人，就是我的答案。
人生的问题难题应用题思考题，这些，就是我的答案。
Monday 2 August 2010
I planned to sleep at 12 sharp tonight.
3 minutes late.
well, why don't make it 10?
Presentation slide is on the way.
and I'm also on the way, to suit whatever I have now.
an empty room.
an empty map.
an empty mood.
an empty mind.
I stop for traffic lights most of the time
and I'm learning to slow things down.
I used to drive kinda...RECKLESSLY?
but, I'm changing.
I really am.
Maybe, all I ever needed, is to be simple and ordinary?
yea. so simple and ordinary that no one will notice me out of this life.
and I will be safe in there.
Holding back my emotions
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