光阴的故事

当我们正用力地活着同时，那些不被我们看好的其他人们

也正用自己的方式经营着自己的人生

也许到头来还是笑话一桩，

但那份对于生活的认真也许是我们所不及的

我们躲在暗处，窥探别人，取笑他们

因为我们总怕自己是过得最差的那一个

也许人从懂得思考所谓进步的那一刻起，

就注定了一辈子得和自由分道扬镳。。。吧？

谁的生活里没有汪茜茜陶复邦孙一美冯拍雄许毅源老孙陶爸陶妈汪娟娟陶复华朱磊朱虹朱妈妈？？

汪茜茜啊！谁没有那种不管什么都不费吹灰之力就把你狠狠地抛在后头的那种邻居？

陶复邦啊！谁没有歇息地里的想要拒绝现实的制度？即使结果通常都嘛是遍体鳞伤！

孙一美啊！谁没有百分百单纯到白痴的傻人朋友？但他们却总是轻而易举的快乐

冯拍雄啊！谁没有那些被人取笑得连自己都不愿意记起的事情？但我们不都学会了怎么去接受现实吗？

许毅源啊！谁没有那种固执的信仰？那种没来由的，无法更不需要被解释的顽固执著

老孙啊！谁没有奢望过可以这种什么都没有却可以感动一个语言不通的人的男朋友？

陶爸啊！谁没有为了生活家计而埋头苦干的爸爸？

陶妈啊！谁没有想要这种打你打得最狠，却疼你疼得最凶的妈妈？

汪娟娟啊！谁没有这种先天比较不足却自卑了大半辈子的同学。

陶复华啊！谁没有那种开不了口的无形压力？

朱磊啊！谁没有那种让人羞耻的家人？

朱虹啊！谁没有这种自私自利自以为有钱大过天的同学？

朱妈妈啊！谁没有这种自我感觉良好的邻居？

疯狂火爆劲辣

辛辣面！！！！！

我放了。。基本的面饼，和蔬菜包 还有调味包

然后，就是我大展拳脚的时候了！

香肠

鸡蛋

包菜

很多小辣椒

辣豆瓣酱

糖

很辣很辣很辣

而且我煮得挺写意的

还有时间上非死不可

写关于那些现成酱料的伟大

i will DIE if there is no paste in my kitchen!!! how do people cook without them??? I SURVIVE THRU THEM!! i even put in paste in instant noodle!!

这就是一种摇滚啊！

试图去弥补破碎的缝隙

洋洋洒洒的写得噼里啪啦

那不就是我吗？

可是谁又知道了？我可以了解孙一美被偷看日记的气

看着陈秀好，就像看见自己的妈妈一样

和张妈相去甚远。

也没什么啦！妈妈这个位子，不好当啊！

有的时候蓦然回首，惊觉其实自己也不是过得很惨

不就是被管得比较严了些吗？但我还不是一样，四处撒野

干过的蠢事一堆，说过的蠢话一箩

也许因为那一次的污点，我从此永远都抬不起头来

和陶复邦一样啊！不是骨子里的坏，我只是不甘心，

不愿意自己的青春就这样一点一滴的流失

而我居然还没有开始挥霍

活在青春期的孩子，谁没有梦了？谁不希望奢望狂妄了？

我们都是在同样的阶段挣扎着所以才会遍体鳞伤

才会累得终于倒在现实的脚跟前，低声下气的求饶

发誓从此只过着务实的日子！

就这样一天过一天，时间到了就买车子，买房子

老人家催了，就牵着另个人去注册

而往往在毫无预警之中，第一个娃儿就在手足无措中

静静的躺在了手掌上

他是多么的渺小，多么的安静

然后就会开始发誓，一定要给这个孩子全世界最好的

慢慢的，第二个娃儿，第三个。。。

日历上很多号码突然重要了起来

生日归生日，农历生日归农历生日，还有圣诞节要给孩子买礼物，新年前得给孩子买新衣服，儿童节啦又得给孩子扮得美美的去上课，孩子毕业也要出席，考试要记得给他进补督促他念书，一年三百六十五天每天上香拜拜都在祈求菩萨保佑一家子顺顺利利，老公平步青云，儿子平步青云，女儿青春美丽，大家平平安安。。。。。。。忘了自己了

当有一天，你看见儿子牵了个女孩回来。你不知道是该开心还是伤心。开心啊！我儿子恋爱了！伤心啊！也不知道这个女孩子哦是不是好人家啦！

当有一天，你看见女儿挽着个男孩回来。你不知道是该快乐还是烦恼。快乐啊！我女儿恋爱了！烦恼啊！也不知道这个难得会不会是那种下三烂的玩弄我女儿感情啊？

“老了老了。”

偶尔这样子感叹。当去医院的次数变得频繁了，当老人病这三个字狠狠地紧粘着你，当老花眼镜比什么都重要的时候，当看一份报纸都得换上一百个姿势的时候，当孩子开始跟你讨论退休的生活的时候。。。。。

我常常在想，我爸爸，在成为我爸爸，在成为我妈妈的丈夫之前，他的生活是如何的？他会和我一样每天熬夜吗？他会为了追偶像而和阿公阿嘛怄气吗？他会为了看电影而拚命地省零用钱吗？

我妈妈呢？她在成为我妈妈，在成为我爸爸的老婆之前，她的日子又是怎么个过法？她会追连续剧吗？她会为爱情片哭得稀里哗啦的吗？她会偷偷存钱买化妆品又不敢让外婆知道吗？

他们会像我和我那般曾经一起疯狂的朋友一样，那般的疯狂过吗？

他们是否曾经也去到海边大声嚷嚷？

他们是否也曾经抗拒束缚，和现实唱反调吗？

我，毫无头绪。

我甚至不知道，他们以前说话的方式

我慢了十几年才进入他们的生活，却从此变成他们生活的中心点　

为了让我吃好的住好的用好的，他们工作

不再出去和朋友彻夜狂欢，为了督促我做功课

不再去提起他们疯狂的青春，为了给我熟悉良好的榜样

不再去追求自己喜欢的偶像明星歌星，为了多留点时间给我们

当我因为他们的赶不上潮流而火大的时候，

我看见了他们无奈的眼神

当他们问我，facebook是什么？

我这才发觉，我剥夺了他们的人生

也许他们对于所谓的疯狂岁月轻狂少年都只剩下模模糊糊的印象了

但当我很大声的吼他们“不要再问了！讲了你也不明白的！”

即使他们很生气的骂了我一顿

但我转身看见他们离去的背影

那时多少辛酸啊！

他们为了让我过得好一些，挨老板的骂，几时我又懂了？

我并不知道什么是生活艰难，因为我爸妈把我照顾得很好

不愁吃不愁喝

我在与时并进的同时，他们摊开了双臂撑着我

不累不苦不吭声

他们不也就是我一样的人嘛！两只手两支脚一个脑袋瓜

我对他们的过去一点知识也没有

就好像，我出生的那一刻，他们死了又复活一样

一个新的人生。新的，是时候学会担当的人生。

回到过去 - 张震岳&林芯仪
作词：张震岳　作曲：张震岳

时间它像是河流 慢慢的轻轻推送
有时候像是漩涡 很难静止而不动
开心的 伤心的
一辈子 能改变什麼 能相信什麼
游走在梦的尽头 也常常不时回首
人与人擦身交错 谁停留谁又远走
我曾经 犯的错
我曾经 留下的遗憾 就让它去吧
如果想要回到那过去
但是你我之间存在遥远的距离
试图去弥补破碎的缝隙
我学著不放弃
愿你牢记我曾经爱过你
因为有你我才学会相信爱情
关于过去的事就藏心底
未来依旧有你的回忆
游走在梦的尽头 也常常不时回首
人与人擦身交错 谁停留谁又远走
我曾经 犯的错
我曾经 留下的遗憾 就让它去吧
如果想要回到那过去
但是你我之间存在遥远的距离
试图去弥补破碎的缝隙
我学著不放弃
愿你牢记我曾经爱过你
因为有你我才学会相信爱情
关于过去的事就藏心底
未来依旧有你的回忆
试图去弥补破碎的缝隙
我学著不放弃
愿你牢记我曾经爱过你
因为有你我才学会相信爱情
关于过去的事就藏心底
未来依旧有你的回忆
未来依旧有你的回忆

。

。

。

。

。

。

。

醒来后 夜还是长夜

有的时候，可以什么都不管，潇洒地坚信船到桥头自然直，

那也是一种guts!!!!

每个人啊，都好像在往自己向往的方向移动

但我却不知道自己在哪里，从哪里来？往哪里去？

人生嘛！总归是会有迷思的。

想不通的东西，甩甩头发就算了吧！

再痛的伤，包了纱布就当看不见了吧！

(节录）渊明-卢广仲

不需要別的人 那虛偽的問候
別再想過去的 是不是朋友
這世界有沒有 屬於我的角落
不要想要找到我 隱形在這地球

Hey just let me go
I know what I tracing for
Hey I gonna go
The day we'll say hello

*********************************

有的时候看着头上那层出不穷的云，

思考着是不是又要下雨的时候，

我会觉得自己很乖，总是顺着这个世界。

我好像忘记了很多东西。

也许这就是被世界驯服吧？

总是一小步一小步地走

深怕走错了毁掉困兽笼里

如果真的现在，我可以不回头的爆炸狂奔，

我会不会真的就这么光着脚，跑过自己所有青春年华的梦？

再一次就好！让我放肆的跑一次！

我要跑过一个发着光的草原，一个因为我的泪水梦想汗水妄想等待牺牲蜕变成长 而发光的草原

那是小时候的伊甸园，算是我心里那块温柔，也许也就只有这一块温柔始终如一，不曾改变。

跌跌撞撞颠颠簸簸的横冲直撞了快二十个年头，

我反过头，却不觉得有什么。

反倒是自己落得一身伤。

灰色空间 作词：姚若龙   作曲：Yoo/Young Seok   编曲：陈飞午   演唱：罗志祥

原来不是白就是黑  只不过是天真的以为  要醉得清醒 要无辜的犯罪  现实的世界只有灰  坚强得太久好疲惫  想抱爱的人沉沉的睡  卷来的风暴 凶猛里有种美  死了心 痛就没感觉  灰色空间 我是谁  记不得幸福是什么滋味  无路可退 你是谁  怎么为我流泪  梦见发着光的草原  一身伤回到很久以前  我选择不恨 带着平静走远  醒来后 夜还是长夜  紧抱着我流泪 

相信自己，明天你就会称霸！

我还有一把吉他，我还有一群死党，

我怕什么？

大不了喊一喊，再努力去生活

Singing in a dark room

i am one day closer to my audit and econ tests...

but i did have a day off from my ordinary dull life with my chingu...

yea, the chingu who lick the knife with the funny face in the previous post..

haha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so as usual lo, singing, shouting.....and do those chic chic stuffs..

and i feel that, everything in our early years could be so deep in heart that you just couldn't get rid of it...

today, we sang songs like, "mamak档" "流星雨" "味道" "忠孝东路走九遍"

(to be precise, we shouted these songs...and yea, WHO CARES!! even chic chic sang,oh no, SHOUTED along!)

i don't know, but it just feel very safe when i am singing these songs..

its like i don't care if people will whisper to each others saying,

"oh, you see, aiyo..still sing this song ar? so outdate hor!"

i don't care and in fact, my friends all sang along when these kind of songs show up.

ha...! i still remember when we sang the huan zhu gege songs...even simyi sang!

see! there are songs that you just couldn't resist!!

you have to sing it! it was like being hypnotized or something!

and i enjoy it...it's like a bonding or some kind of bound-to-your-DNA type of traits.

whenever you are forgetting who are you, where are you from...pick the songs and sing out loud...

you will be surprised that you are still you...

we might thought we have lost our purest inner self but

hey! we are still we....although with quite a number of add ons,

we are still the one who sing the same songs,

shout at the chorus part,

laugh at the wrongly-sang part

starred at the same MV and forget to continue singing...

its actually hard to actually LOST yourself...

i mean, all the while, you are who you are...

you don't just lost for some stupid reasons..

we just feel lost, but we aren't..

I love singing in a dark room where my lovely friend is right there beside me.

i feel safe, and warm (even the air cond is damn cold!)

singing is a very miracle thing i would say.

(as you can see the number or karaoke lounge is increasing day by day)

when people got upset in love or friendship or watsoever,

they might burst into disaster-level of tears because of a sentence in a song...

its just a few words and a melody...and tat does it all!!!!

wow! how amazing.......non?

haha~ and ohya, people, please pray for my chic chic, i ACCIDENTALLY left it at the knife-licking chingu's car....and i WARNED her not to harm it, but i don't know...she got madly in love in my chic chic, they shared the SAME MIC!! that's indirect kissing namely!! T.T

please pray, for my chic chic will come back nice, not harmed!!

CHIC CHIC!!!!

i am so sorry!!!

(can i call police? but this is not kidnapping, this is.........argh!! JUST PRAY! shall we?!)

就在那多愁善感而初次回憶的青春

我看了这一部戏的第一集

原以为自己失去了对于连续剧的坚持和耐性

但这不一样。

这是一个光阴的故事

一个让我们倒带重温那些年那些人那些事的故事

当这些人的名字变成我脑海里的一块

就像那些遥远的从前一般

我们无处安放的青春

我们流离寻岸的回忆

我们打打闹闹的童年

我们所有最深刻的体验

开始慢慢的浮现出来

好的，不好的，坏的，伤心的，悲哀的，好笑的，不好笑的，可怜的，快乐的，兴奋的，美丽的，梦幻的，烦恼的，无奈的，懊恼的，白痴的。。。。。

每个人的童年都在向往成长中，缓缓的从黑暗隧道的另一头走来

站在这一头的我们，却声嘶力竭的叫喊着停止，

多希望自己可以停留在那里

不要再走了，长大后的世界，多了一样叫做现实的东西，那可是残酷的代名词啊！

但同样的，我们也无法听见十年以后的自己如何出尽全力的提醒我们，

这很公平，不是吗？

每个人都有自己的那些年，那段光阴的故事

光陰的故事

作詞：羅大佑　作曲：羅大佑　唱 : 張艾嘉

春天的花開　秋天的風以及冬天的落陽

憂鬱的青春　年少的我曾經無知的這麼想

光陰它帶走四季的歌裡我輕輕的悠唱

風花雪月的詩句裡我在年年的成長

流水它帶走光陰的故事改變了一個人

就在那多愁善感而初次等待的青春

發黃的相片　古老的信以及褪色的聖誕卡

年輕時為你寫的歌恐怕你早已忘了吧

過去的誓言就像那課本裡繽紛的書籤

刻劃著多少美麗的詩可是終究是一陣煙

流水它帶走光陰的故事改變了兩個人

就在那多愁善感而初次流淚的青春

遙遠的路程　昨日的夢以及遠去的笑聲

再次的見面我們又歷經了多少的路程

不再是舊日熟悉的你　有著舊日狂熱的夢

也不是舊日熟悉的我　有著依然的笑容

流水它帶走光陰的故事改變了我們

就在那多愁善感而初次回憶的青春

有些歌有些人有些故事，

一想起来，心就揪着疼

一哼起来，泪就簌簌的流

一提起来，片断就不断不断地涌现

流水它帶走光陰的故事改變了我們

就在那多愁善感而初次回憶的青春...........................................................................................................

who don't have downturn in life that you just wish you were someone better?

(i personally like this picture =)

so I went to cameron highland..ha!

how many times i need to repeat this huh?

fine,....change,

so I finished studying 3 chapter of Audit...

unfortunately, i can only recall.....

"Reasonable Assurance"

"True and Fair View"

"Control Risk"

.......

....

well, i did try my best.

I just simply LOVE my jelly lens.

each time i got it on hand...i feel like creating miracless

fascinated by the colour...

nothing much actually

You've NEVER been to cameron

IF

you NEVER DO THE STRAWBERRY thing...

stilll.i find it funny n cute

My last meal in cameron is this.

i tried to smile in a similar to the old-famous-RICH guy,

but i think...not that obvious my intention huh?

-Quietly Fantastic-

why am i so obsess with this 2 words?

it was like a miracle to me..

I am a NEVER-SETTLE-DOWN type of person..

notice the changes of my blog layout?

I hardly stick to a thing long...

BUT

i've never thought of changing the two words being my blog title!!

these words actually come from Kim Edgar..

A singer from England..

She had a song----"Quietly Fantastic"

she actually dedicated it to her friend which i found the lyrics rather meaningful...

so i cut n paste it. hehe

its really surprising that i can stick to this for such a long time!

just like me being so keen on blogging since....form 4?

its good to see memories when we're free once in a while..

it was like, an evidence,

showing, hey, that was you!! what a distant huh!!

For i hardly hold things long, i appreciate everything i have i my hand...

means, better appreciate first before regretting for lost...

i once wanted to hold everything so tight that i eventually lost my might n lose everything...

that was like the darkest time of my life..

(how funny, a not-even-20 teen is talking bout "darkest time")

i was so damn lost that i don't even recognize myself...

I went round n round reading blogs and

wasted time envying others life..

yea, i was that kind of loser...

Even more,

I act like someone totally not myself..

I disguised myself into something i thought "Awesome"

but instead, it is merely purely absolutely "Stupid"

sighss....!

who don't have bad hair days?

who don't have too-over-kind of memories?

who don't have downturn in life that you just wish you were someone better?

We are all the same after all...

similarly brought up

similarly educated

similarly living

similarly....

then and then, we, from whom we were brought up,

we departed......towards some direction

maybe pushed or pulled by friend

or just simply going around anywhere you like,

we end up whom we are today..

sitting here, talking bout memories...friendship...future.....

*because of all of you, I realized that my memories are pretty much awesome*

I can't imagine whom will i be in 10 years 5 years time...

but i am trying my very best to not disappoint her, the future me..

I am not sure if i am doing the right thing now..

But i do wish she(the future me) will at least feel good for having me as part of her past..

as per mentioned,

till now,I've got few years in between my life which i really wished it could RESTART all over again!

I felt humiliated each and every time i was forced to recall any moment of those..

!

and urm.

now that i admit, i m having literally DIFFERENT people as close friends every year..

when i was still a girl bound to uniforms...

i don't know what happen..

BUT i just get close to different people..I feel like i was cursed..

i once had a BEST friend in form 3-form4 time and we were still best of friends until beginning of form 5.(well, we met at form 2 but get closed at form 3 and...i don't know, i did treat her as my best friend, so...she is my best friend)

We always go to the canteen and refill water together during recess....

and out of sudden, she stopped eating at canteen,

but she still come all the way down from the top floor(4th!!!) to the ground floor...

accompanying me to canteen, see me eat.....and refill water and go up...

I feel awkard and also, we've got lesser and lesser topics...

so i suggested her not to come down again...

I supposed she do feel a lil awkard to turn my suggestion down,

so she just accept it....

FOR GOD SAKE...since then, we were like LOST CONTACT..

and since dunnowhen...we are two schoolmates, only SCHOOLMATES...

we don't shout at each other anymore

we don't know what happened to each other at home yesterday anymore

we don't tease each other like what we used to do everyday.....

whenever met, we just nodded out head, and walk away..

THAT FEELING SUCKSS....

and i don't only lose her as a best fren, i lose another as well...

for 3 of us used to be kinda...a gang?

its funny when you see once-best-friend

and you only nodded....

i still remember when we used to hang out at her house...

when we feel tired bout tuition and her house is just right there..!

I think most of you should know who i am referring to...

well....yea..its her...

there was once a person asked me, how come you 2 so good thn suddenly like don't know each other.........

i don't know, so i kept silent...

but i do think bout it several times..

maybe we are too shy to start the conversation?

maybe its awkard that we lost contact for so long and who knows whats on your mind now?

haizz...people just come and go...

we just stand and sighs and try to remember them as long as we could...

************

something sad to say,

I don't even have a photo with my this once-very-best friend...

such a waste huh?

but i do learn something!

DON'T FEEL AWKARD OR SHY in front of your own fren...

its gonna do you nothing but silly and regret.!

i m thinking, the next time i see her in a mall or something,

i will shout at her or wave at her...

do something stupidly funny...

.......................

that should decrease the awkradness at least for a lil huh!

My routine pages:

(Windows Media Player)

music is life man!!

|

|

|

|

\/

(Facebook)

Yea, sort of the world's addiction

|

|

|

|

\/

(Blog)

for i have so many thoughts,this is my warehouse for all those.

|

|

|

|

\/

(Twitter)

to express short thoughts

** believe it or not, these few pages gonna make my day!!

chingu~

this is chingu lin....

We're the chingu....

ANG SHE GOT HER FREEDOM NOWW!!!!!

BYE BYE STPM!!! SAY HI TO THE WONDERFUL WORLD!!!!

see how "hungry" she is?!!!!

-ENJOY! your highness!...with love, from chingu En-